THE LIMIT OF ONENESS

Helpthefamily 304 Comments

“Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.” [Matt. 19:6]

In any “red-lettered” Bible version, we would see that the above is a direct word from the mouth of the Lord Jesus Christ. This is talking about the bond of marriage. Heaven’s design demands that the moment a man and a woman come together in holy matrimony, they are no longer and should not any longer see themselves as different individuals. Marital life should be an end of singleness: and the birth of a new indivisible marital entity – in purpose, plans, words and deeds. That is the mind of God concerning marriage.

But is there no bound or limit to this oneness in marriage? Should the two people always go in the same direction, notwithstanding the destination? I think this issue requires a frank consideration in every marriage.

There is a family in the Bible whose story raises this question in my heart. It is the marriage of Ananias and Sapphira. Acts of the Apostles chapter five verses 1-11 is the only place where the story of this couple can be found in the Bible. It’s a very popular and very striking Bible story that I suppose is instructive on the issue we are raising here – the limit of marital oneness.

Let me quote the story:

“But a certain man named Ananias, with Sapphira his wife, sold a possession.

And he kept back part of the proceeds, his wife also being aware of it, and brought a certain part and laid it at the apostles’ feet.

But Peter said, “Ananias, why has Satan filled your heart to lie to the Holy Spirit and keep back part of the price of the land for yourself?

“While it remained, was it not your own? And after it was sold, was it not in your own control? Why have you conceived this thing in your heart? You have not lied to men but to God.”

Then Ananias, hearing these words, fell down and breathed his last. So, great fear came upon all those who heard these things.

And the young men arose and wrapped him up, carried him out, and buried him

Now it was about three hours later when his wife came in, not knowing what had happened.

And Peter answered her, “Tell me whether you sold the land for so much?” She said, “Yes, for so much.”

Then Peter said to her, “How is it that you have agreed together to test the Spirit of the Lord? Look, the feet of those who have buried your husband are at the door, and they will carry you out.”

Then immediately she fell down at his feet and breathed her last. And the young men came in and found her dead, and carrying her out, buried her by her husband.

So great fear came upon all the church and upon all who heard these things.” [NKJV]

The church of which this couple was members agreed together before the witness of the Holy Spirit to have a common purse. The working of this entailed that whoever sold a major asset among the brethren should bring the whole sales proceed to the church to be distributed among all the members according to need.

Many (e.g. Barnabas), in the spirit of the “common agreement”, had been bringing the proceeds of the sales of their lands, houses, etc. for the entire congregation to enjoy. And Ananias and Sapphira were part of such beneficiaries.

Now, this couple also sold a land and instead of bringing the whole sum, the man kept back some part thereof. Ironically, the wife was aware of this crime; in fact, she aided and abetted the fraud! From the story, we could see the terrible result of their oneness in crime!

Should husband and wife, in the spirit of oneness, go together in a path that’s contrary to God and/or on a route that’s destined for destruction and/or hell? Will a spouse be offending God by refusing to walk and/or work in unison with his/her spouse on an obvious way of sin and destruction? In my candid opinion, the answer should be an emphatic NO! I honestly don’t think that God will insist otherwise either.

Yes, you are to remain one, for better, or for worse; but not in sin and in the highway to destruction and hell! In fact, in cases like the above story, rather than agreeing together in evil, a good spouse should disagree in order to save his/her spouse from falling into the pit of destruction and hell. Sapphira’s connivance with her hubby’s wicked act eventually ended both of them in shameful downfall and destruction. Had Sapphira firmly stood up against her husband in that evil, though the man might have felt offended initially, they both would have lived afterward to thank God together.

Do you know that humanity’s downfall and calamities actually have its root in this kind of unholy oneness? Yes, Adam threw away her positional authority and deliberately disobeyed God to be one with his wife in eating the forbidden fruit! The Bible says, “And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.” Instead of rebuking his wife and refusing to support that infraction against God’s instruction, he chose rather to be one with his wife in that crime! We all are sufferers of the consequences of that unholy alliance till today.

Friend, it pays to disagree to agree on the point of righteousness. You may at that point be offending your spouse; but I think it’s better to offend man than to offend God. It’s saver to be on the Lord’s side at such time. You need to realize that your spouse must have embarked on that destructive journey “Satan having filled his/her heart”. The purpose of Satan in such situation is nothing but “to steal, to kill, and to destroy” your spouse and your home [Jn. 10:10]. Your role in such situation should be to arise and save your spouse and your home from the impending doom, rather than loving him/her to mutual ruination. Indeed, you’ll be doing God a service by standing up for God in such circumstances: and God would certainly approve of your righteous standing and be pleased you do.

However, in your standing for righteousness in such circumstances, there is the need to do all things as much as possible in godly love, truth and genuineness of intention, yet firmly and uncompromisingly.

Think over this!

Author: Dayo St. John

[Pastor Dayo St. John is God’s Helmsman for Help for the Family Ministry. He and his family, as well as the Ministry’s Headquarters, are based in Lagos, Nigeria.]

info@helpforthefamily.com

helpforthefamilyministry@gmail.com

Note: Be a part of our daily devotional tagged “THE FAMILY ALTAR”. It is posted on weekly tranches (Sunday – Saturday) on our Website [on the page: THE FAMILY ALTAR], and daily on the Ministry’s FB Page: www.facebook.com/HelpfortheFamilyMinistryLagosNigeria

Get your copies of deeply enriching books from Pastor Dayo St. John, on AMAZON! Please visit www.amazon.com/author/dayostjohn

MARRIED MAN & WOMAN

304 responses to “THE LIMIT OF ONENESS”

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